[LIFESTYLE] Can you keep a secret?

[joonsexual]

CAN YOU KEEP A SECRET?

Something really interesting has been brought to my attention! If there are things you want to say, but feel that WTF doesn't offer that anonymity then, you can try this linke: thought room. Or, if you just need a place to relax/think, the same site offers an excellent place for that too: the quiet space.


The purpose of the thread is not to induce conversations or discussions.

Ideally, there will be NO discussion of another poster's post. If you feel compelled to discuss something concerning someone else's post, please take it to private messages.

The thread is created with only one idea in mind: To give people a place to just get things off their chest without suffering judgment of any kind.

I know there are threads for venting and for discussing things that are "blank," but those threads don't cover the times when people just need a place to say the things which worry them or the things which bothers them. The posts here aren't focused on anger-trips. The posts here are the things you'd find in someone's diary, scrawled on bathroom stalls, or scratched into table tops.

So, in a way, the posts here are confessions — admissions of guilt, of fears, and of everything that falls in-between.


DO NOT — FOR ANYONE REASON — MOCK ANOTHER PERSON'S POST.




I had the idea from a thread on Gaia, which, I confess, I used intermittently. And, I figured, if people wanted to, there should be a place like that here as well. Although, if I were honest, I just wanted a place where I could retain my anonymous status and just blurt out my most pressing thoughts and feelings without worrying about having to face people tomorrow or next week or ever.

[Xavirne]

On the outside, I look fine. But on the inside...

I will never forgive myself for what I did. I must punish myself, hate myself.

[Schizophrenic]

I can't look at anyone without feeling incredibly insecure.

[joonsexual]

To the people who did nothing wrong:

There was nothing you could have done to stop the argument.
I would have lashed out no matter what you did or didn't do.
I need to displace and you were just trying to help.

I'm sorry.

[Xavirne]

I can never seem to please my mother. A 3.5 isn't good enough. It's not a 4.0. A 99 isn't as good as a 100. She claims she doesn't care about the grades I get, but, clearly, she does. It's impossible being the perfect child when everything about me is imperfect. And being called a bitch and being told "you'll never have friends or a boyfriend" never helps either. I hate my life. I hate who I am. I hate what I've become.

[Impish]

I feel like an idiot. I keep trusting you, versions of you, and in the end it's always the same.
I'm broken, there's nothing left inside anymore. It's all ripped to shreds. I ripped it to shreds and tried to fix it.
Then you came and now...
Everything is falling apart and I don't know how to fix it. I can barely get out of the bed.
I'm tired. So tired of everything. Tired of breathing.

[Utopia]

I have turned into an old person. I caught myself thinking, "Ye flippin' Gods, kids are dumber than a pile of pebbles these days." It is just a matter of owning a lawn until I yell, "Get off my god damned lawn."

[joonsexual]

Lately, all I want to do is punch you in the face.

And I'm about two seconds away from calling you out on your bullshit.
Because, let's facce it, you're full of it.

But, you know what? I probably won't because I actually respect the other people who are involved.

[Schizophrenic]

I am so tired of your act, and I'm not the only one.

[Misaru]

What can I say? Everytime I try, it never works. It is like my mind refuses the chance to take any form of happiness, even though I clearly want it. My standards and guards are to high. I hate people without cause thus never let them get close. Is it because they are not worth me or is it actualy the other way around? Likely the latter.

[joonsexual]

It's kind of pathetic that, in order to feel important, some people have to lie about everything.

But, I suppose, there is another level that's sadder still...

[Schizophrenic]

I almost hate that you've done this to me.

But at the same time would be broken if you ever vanished.
A binge on emotional rendezvous was not what I had planned,

but that's what I got.
.... and now the moments I am alone are the moments I relapse.

Even...
Even those moments when I'm not alone, and he's close... begging me for the attention I'm devoting to you...
I'm somewhere else.

I feel you, I see you, I hear you.

It may be taking a toll on me, I'm not really sure. I feel split. "Like a half moon, one dark side and one bright side."

I worry things will only get harder, but I could never pull back.
I worry the day your morals kick in...
...or possibly mine.

I need your smile.
I need your voice.
I need your touch.

Yet...

I see his smile.
I hear his voice.
I feel his touch.

This is wrong, this is a dream... but "such is life" and I can't let go.

Selfishly .... I'll never let go.

[joonsexual]

There are "bad" days where, when I wake up, I regret everything.
And then there are bad days where I don't even bother to wake up.

[Omlyt]

No matter what I do, you just want to try to pick a fight, by pointing out my insecurities and just stomping me into the ground. I don't think you understand that I've grown up and that I see the world in a different way now.
I try my best to impress you, coming back to you like a lost puppy wanting attention. But you push me away when I need you, and pull me closer when I don't.

But no one will know.
I'll just put on a smile and shrug it all out.
You call me stupid, idiotic and crazy
But you push me to follow my dreams.

You scare me.

I'm doing my best so I won't be like you- lazy, uneducated, temperamental...
Going through men as if they were all but broken toys.
I will be nothing like you.
I just know it.

And that's the only thing we both agree on. The fact that I must become better than you. Be smarter than you, be more grateful for the opportunities I'm given, instead of throwing them all away like you did.

[Schizophrenic]

If you knew I was dieing... would it change anything?

[Avarice]

I must tolerate your intolerance and it kills me each time you make him say those things that he doesn't fully understand.

[La_H]

I wish I could look in the mirror and be content with myself.
I wish I had real friends that actually understand how I feel and think.
I wish I could stop destroying myself with bad thoughts and bad actions.
I simply wish my life was over, so I can sleep peacefully for once.

But I guess that's too much to ask.

[Xavirne]

Side comment: I feel like some of these would make GREAT cards to hold up for photoshoots. Stuff like this... only more professional looking.

[Misaru]

I wanna go. You know it, I know it.
I hate being underlined and treated as such.
I ain't fucking perfect but take a damn look in the mirror if you can stomach it.
I know I couldn't if I were you.
But then again you have no idea the fucking hastle you cause.
But how much of this is on my own head. Or in it. Fuck knows.
Oh you, Oh me, why did we all have to come in and fuck up my life for a while?
Such a manic shitstorm~!
SQUIGGLE SQUIGGLE LESSTHANTHREE FUCK YOU.

[Avarice]

I'm sorry I entered your life when I did. We could have been something. I know we tried to, but neither of us were ready for that. I know we both regret what happened, but the burden of blame lies on you, and you know this. Own up and grow up.

[Xavirne]

Leaving you was the biggest mistake I could have made.
The distance between us now kills me.
I wish I could take back what I said. I didn't mean it, I swear.
I wish I wasn't so naive back then. Although, I'm still pretty naive now.
Since leaving you, I've found a side of me I didn't want to be.
And now that I've undergone this change, I'm afraid you won't take me back.
Hell, I wouldn't take me back....

[watching-and-waiting]

My faith and feelings conflict.
I believe everything in the Bible...
My faith may send me to Hell

[Schizophrenic]

This is going to sound terribly cliche, but I feel like I'm roleplaying in my real life every day. I'm becoming very detached from Kate... and I don't know if that's a good thing or not.

[watching-and-waiting]

As silly as it may sound... I'm still terrified of the dark.

[MarineViolet]

I wish you'd acknowledge me. I also wish you'd stop playing mind games with me. Damnit, just tell me what you think of me!
To my best friend, why is it that I have to be there for you, but you're never there for me? I'm starting to think this is a one-sided friendship. And to think, of everything I've done for you...

[joonsexual]

I think you're a parasite—a cancer on our existence.

I think you're childish, immature, and rude.

Please, stop being such a brat and wake up to smell the goddamn roses.

Sincerely, a concerned party.

[joonsexual]

我很强调。。。 我压力太大了！！ （一 ＿＿＿ 一）
我可能没有工作和我的生是走得太快。 有人救我！ 救命！！！

[Schizophrenic]

I think I'm over it.

[Avarice]

You should break up with her. You need to, you have to. You're nothappy in this relationship, buddy. It pains me to see you cry, I can't possibly defend someone who made you cry. I know she's a soldier. I know she has PTSD, and I know she takes her frustrations out on her friends. And I know you can take it. But that doesn't mean I want you to. You don't deserve to be the object of her wrath. She does.

I'll be honest, there is a small part of me who wants you to break up with her out of jealousy, or desire, but I know better than to act on those impulses. I'm not going to cuddle up next to you as soon as you break up with her, heck, I don't even like you like that anymore, but I can't change the fact that I'm immensely, irrevocably, insanely attracted to you, but I'm with a girl right now, I couldn't possibly flatter such thoughts at the moment, it wouldn't be fair to any of us. So when I tell you you're not happy, stop focusing on what I would have to gain on your sadness, because the answer is nothing.

You're not happy, babe. I can't stand to see you cry again. Break up with her, buddy. Laugh again.

[Syrasya]

I'm waiting for you even when I know you probably never even heard of my existence.
What should I do?
Should I just go to you and tell you that I want you?
I'm afraid because I fear of being in the same pile of all the girls who are pining over you.
Wait, aren't I the same?
I'm holding on to that one shred of hope to be different by staying away from you.
But is it really?
Or is it just an excuse because I'm too damn scared of the answer.
Maybe that's the reason I never asked you the question.