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Terrible Pickup Lines
I want to hear them. I've had a few really bad ones I've used, but I'm just a goofy girl so everyone knew I was just being a nutcase. But oh dear god, there are some people who are 100% serious with their line. I want to hear the worst lines you've ever received or given. If you don't know any, ask a friend. I'm just dying to have a good laugh. I've googled some to start this off. I PRAY no one has ever had these used on them..."Do you clean your clothes with windex? [awkward pause] Because I see myself in your pants"
"Hey, do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checkin' out ma' package!"
"Your dress looks fantastic, but it would look better rumpled up at the foot of my bed"
Going up to the girl "If I was an astronaut, I'd orbit around Uranus"
---------- Post added at 12:38 PM ---------- Previous post was at 12:36 PM ----------
Now to share the one that is ALWAYS used on me....
So I here you're a Gillette, the best a man can get.
or
A Gillette? Let me find out if you're the best a man can get.
It's usually something along those lines. And yes, Gillette is my last name. Ya know, like the razor.
"Hey baby, wanna ride in my big blue box?"
...
What? Doctors get lonely, traveling to the farthest reaches of space and time. Queen Elizabeth was much naughtier than a virgin queen should be.
Before you ask, Yes, I am indeed a madman in a box.
The Arrival of Sorrow - Currently in need of players
Oh my gosh, I had no idea the Doctor was checkin' in!
Best pickup line: *grabs package* Hm?
And I hope you have not a single still moment.
Errr... some of us are guys. I feel like I can't really add anything to this thread.
You can add bad ones your friends have used lol.
Funny one used by an awkward high school freshman on me when I was a senior: "How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to break the ice!" First time I heard it it was hilarious then he got creepy.
Most of the time I don't get pick up lines though, I just get really obviously creepy things. Like I was at working, greeting people at American Eagle and this soldier (military base in my town, so skeezy soldiers are ALWAYS at the mall) walked in. this was the conversation:
Me: "Hi, how are you, what can I help you find today?" *smile*
Creepy Guy: "Oh nothing I just saw a redhead in here and wanted to say hi to you..."
Me: "Oh.. umm.. thanks... well our jeans are on sale"
Creeper: "I thought it was really cool that a redhead was here and I love redheads so I really wanted to say hi"
Me: "Ermmm.... okay.. well" *tries desperately to escape*
Male Co-worker comes up: "Allison, Ashlyn needs you to go to fitting rooms now, I'm covering the front.
Me, immensely releived: "Oh okay, Bye" (to the guys as I'm literally trying to run away)
Creeper: "BYE NEW REDHEAD FRIEND"
Co-worker: "Soo.. what can I help you with"
Creeper leaves.
That shit happens to me ALL THE TIME.
First: Do you have any raisins? No? How about a date?
Second: You're like a prize winning fish... I dont know whether to eat you or mount you
and thirdly My magical watch says you aren't wearing any panties. Oh, you are? It must be an hour fast!
Yeah them the corn balls of them all - at least in my world
Updates Mondays
You know, I freaking love two of the ones used as terrible examples. xD The polar bear one is my absolute favorite pick-up line I've ever heard and the one about the clothes looking good in a pile is my second favorite, though I've never actually heard it used in real life. xD
I've rarely had actual pick-up lines used on me before, because I don't often get into situations where they'd be used, but when I was chatting with guys before there have been conversations that were about bad pick-up lines. It oddly worked very well on me to have them used in that fashion, because they were sooooo cheesy and awful that to have the guys joking about how awful they are was rather charming. One of the two guys who used them in that manner was someone I had been trying to get out of a conversation with, but when I realized how much of a sense of humor he had, it kept me interested enough to exchange information with him. We never contacted each other after it, but I still have to give him props as the only guy I can think of who'd not had my interest until he used cheesy pick-up lines. xD
Maneki Neko
"To respect the (shark)cat is the beginning of the aesthetic sense."
- Erasmus Darwin
><; I find cheesy pickup lines adorable, especially when they mess up halfway through them. When their face turns red and they start stuttering on words. Ugh, I love watching them squirm. >:] (I'm so cruel.)
I think the worst pickup line I used was actually in a dream. OMG was it terrible. After I woke up, I beat myself up. "How did YOU of all people fail that hard with a pickup line" is what I kept thinking. Anyway, this is the dream/line....I was swimming in a pool just minding my own business when this totally hottie walked by. At that time, I was underwater (don't ask how I could tell if he was super hot when under the water -- I guess I had super vision in the dream, idk) when I saw him walk by.I then woke up and was like WTF, Jen. WTF! XD
Now, being a natural swimmer (I was on swim team), I was completely taken aback when I realized I had started drowning! Within seconds, I was back on land and in the arms of the totally dreamy guy.
"Are you okay, miss?" he asked me.
"Yeah, I'm fine. Thanks."
"What happened."
"You took my breath away."
You took my breath away with how hilarious that is and how hard it made me laugh XD
~RL= Nightmare... RP Interest= Bedridden...~
Artist and Writer: http://tigerkytti.deviantart.com/
Self Proclaimed Goddess of RP, and Corrupter of the Innocent!
The Jayded Tygress
Kytti
I've used this line in the past:
"POOF! I'm here. Now what are your other two wishes."
Which got the response:
"1. You. Naked. 2. Chains."
I think it was pretty successful.
While I was waiting. . . I ate your lunch.
I've never used these. But they're bad
I think I need a Paralyze Heal, because you're stunning
My Kadabra just used Future Sight, and it looks like we've got a future together.
Are you a Hitmonlee cause your body is kickin'.
YES! I love the Pokemon pickup lines. Totally epic.Originally Posted by year_of_the_fox
I've never used these. But they're bad
I think I need a Paralyze Heal, because you're stunning
My Kadabra just used Future Sight, and it looks like we've got a future together.
Are you a Hitmonlee cause your body is kickin'.
Just so you know I'm going to use every one of those in the future.I've never used these. But they're bad
I think I need a Paralyze Heal, because you're stunning
My Kadabra just used Future Sight, and it looks like we've got a future together.
Are you a Hitmonlee cause your body is kickin'.
And I hope you have not a single still moment.
I've had the paralyze heal one used on me.I've never used these. But they're bad
I think I need a Paralyze Heal, because you're stunning
My Kadabra just used Future Sight, and it looks like we've got a future together.
Are you a Hitmonlee cause your body is kickin'.
While I was waiting. . . I ate your lunch.
MY LOVE FOR YOU IS LIKE EXPLOSIVE DIARRHEA, I JUST CAN'T HOLD IT IN.
Though, to be honest I think I would at least kiss the guy who used this line on me. Possibly, date him too. It's golden in my books. >D
"Girl, are you Medusa? Because your stare is makin' me rock hard."
Or... something like that. I almost died laughing when I heard it!
And I hope you have not a single still moment.
Internet come ons are the worst by far.
And I hope you have not a single still moment.
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