Stop and Stare

I worked out like crazy, with the mix of alcohol and exercise I became extremely dehydrated and laid down to rest, trying to stay awake. I fell asleep in the back corner, no one saw me when they closed the gym.

I eventually went back to our dorm and wasn't surprised when I saw that Broady wasn't there. "She probably went to that girl's place.." I muttered to myself. I laid down in bed and cried myself to sleep. Why did I have to mess up?

When I began to wake up, I could hear voices. The sun was coming through the window, morning... I had been here all night? I felt really thirsty... I closed my eyes and the next time I opened them I was in the hospital. I guess I was too dehydrated... They didn't release me until about three in the afternoon, and as I walked back to the door, I itched at the hospital blanket on my wrist... Stupid thing. I had to keep it on for three days.

When I had heard that Broady went to the hospital, I freaked out. I skipped my next class and rushed to the dorm, opening the door. When I saw Broady sitting there, I sighed and glanced at the hospital blanket on her wrist. "What happened Broady?" I asked softly.

"I passed out at the gym... They made me go to the hospital... I'm fine,"I said softly, rubbing my eyes gently. I looked up at her, trying to hide the sadness in my eyes as I stood up,"No need to worry."

I reached out to touch her, but I decided not to and dropped my hand. I looked down and said,"I'm sorry.."

"Don't be... I never should have brought her home, it won't happen again,"I said gently, hugging myself as I looked at the ground.

I shook my head. "You're a grown woman... You can take anyone home you want... I shouldn't have reacted the way I did.." I whispered, blinking away the tears that were threatening to fall.

"Just forget it, alright? We can just pretend like it never happened,"I said gently, turning to look at her. I sighed when I saw the gloss in her eye. I gently took her cheek in my hand and kissed the other,"It's all okay, right?"

I closed my eyes when she kissed my cheek. It's been so long since I've even really touched her. I opened my eyes and looked up at her. "I don't know what came over me.. I guess I'm just selfish.." I said softly, walking over to sit on my bed.

"Selfish?Luna, why does that make you selfish?"I asked softly, frowning as I sat down on my own bed, watching her.

"It doesn't matter.. I just got upset over nothing.." I answered. I took a deep, shaky breath and looked down at my lap, staring at the pattern in my cute little white dress. If I were to look at her right now, I would cry.

Nothing... I was nothing. I sighed gently and looked up at her. I moved to sit next to her and wrapped my arms around her in a gentle hug. It reminded me of the huricane.

I closed my eyes and turned my body, hugging her back gently, my head resting on her shoulder. Just like during the hurricane.. I remember that night vividly. It was the best night in the world.

I held her to me for awhile, about fifteen minutes before I gently pulled back and kissed her forehead,"I'm sorry... And, don't you say it again,"I said, pressing my fingers gently to her lips,"We're good... Everything is okay."

I smiled at her gently. "I won't interfere with your fun ever again." I whispered. I looked at the clock. "I better get back to class. I've already skipped 2.. See you later.." I got up and walked out the door, sighing as I walked slowly towards my class.

I moved back to my bed, pulling a bottle of water from my bag. I drank some of it before lying down and falling asleep. Luna...God, she didn't have to worry about me bringing anyone home. I didn't want anyone else.

At 8, I grabbed some food for both me and Broady and then went to the dorm. I saw that she was asleep and I set her food at her bedside, watching her for a moment. I leaned down and kissed her forehead softly. I pulled back and went to my own bed, taking out my burger and eating slowly.

When I woke up, I saw her eating and yawned, rubbing my eye with my fist gently. I smiled at her and sat up,"Thanks,"I said, grabbing my own food."

I smiled at her and nodded. She looks so cute all sleepy.. "You're welcome." I replied softly. I took a sip of my coke and looked down, sighing softly. "How are you feeling?" I asked.

"I'm okay... Still feeling kind of strange,"I said with a shrug, sighing gently,"How are you?"

I shrugged and ate a small fry. "The same as always.. Fine." I said softly, glancing at her. After I finished eating, I brushed my teeth and then excused myself to take a long shower. I just sat there most of the time with my eyes closed. What am I going to do?

I needed a shower, as well, and was surprised to notice she was still in. I took the stall beside her, glancing at the wall, which I knew she was on the other side,"What's on your mind, lovely?"

I was surprised at the sound of her voice and I sighed, leaning my head against the wall. "Nothing of great importance.." I lied. I was thinking about her. And she IS of great importance.

I reached around the wall, touching her shoulder gently,"Talk to me, Luna... Please."

I jumped slightly and turned my head, looking at her hand. "I'm okay Broady.. Really..." I whispered, tears in my eyes, which was shielded by the water.

I ran my fingers down her arm until I found her hand, holding in gently in my own,"You're lying..."

I looked down at her hands and sighed softly, squeezing hers gently. "I just.. I don't know...." I shook my head. "I don't know what's wrong with me."

"Nothing is wrong with you... Luna, you're amazing,"I whispered the last sentence to myself, nothing anyone could hear over the water.

I sighed softly and let the tears fall. "I don't know why I got so upset.. I don't know why I got so jealous.. I don't know.." I said. There was a moment of silence and I squeezed her hand in a death grip. I don't want to let her go.

The way she was squeezing my hand. I knew she needed me. There was no one else in the shower room, and I slipped into her stall, turning her to look at me. Her eyes were red and puffy, and though I couldn't track tears, I knew they were there. I placed my hand on her cheek, moving it to the back of her neck,"Just breath... You're okay... I'm right here,"I said gently, intertwining my fingers with hers.

I looked into her eyes. I didn't look at her body like I normally would have. Because then it was just about sex. Now, I love her. Oh my god I love her. My body began to shake softly. I cant tell her this. What if she doesnt feel the same? Obviously she doesnt because brought a girl home..

She was trembling and crying and I didn't know how to fix it... I stared into her eyes, looking for an answer. I sighed,"Honey... Please, talk to me..."

I sighed and stayed silent until I calmed down. I let go of her. "I love you Broady." I whispered. I turned my back on her, afraid to see her reaction.

I felt overall shock. She said what? She feels how? I stared at her, trying to figure out what this all was. I let out a gentle breath, wrapping my arms around her from behind and kissing the back of her neck,"I love you... Luna... I've loved you for a long time..." It was true. We'd been living together for more than a month, almost two, and I loved her since week one, since the hurricane...

I was shocked. She seriously feels the same? I took a deep breath and looked down. "Why did you bring that girl home if you loved me?" I whispered. I was still hurt about that.

"Because I felt rejected... I felt like I tried and you didn't want me,"I whispered honestly into her ear, sighing,"I didn't want anything with her... I just needed the attention."

I turned slowly and looked into her eyes. She really is telling the truth. "I'm sorry..." I whispered, reaching my hand to stroke his cheek gently.

"Stop apologizing,"I said gently, my hands meeting behind her back. I sighed gently and rubbed my nose against hers,"There's no need for it,"I said gently, smiling at her reassuringly. I leaned in, kissing her like gently, like I tried to the night we drank those heavy beers.

I had missed her lips so much. It has been so long. I wrapped my arms around her neck and kissed her back softly. It was perfect.