Cautious Love

The whole honeymoon experience was absolutely fantastic. And very night we did the same as the first, improving with every one.
Once we landed at home, we got our luggage and had more jet lag to deal with. Luckily it was 8 o clock in the afternoon, so when we got back we could just sleep ..

We went and crashed in my bedroom for a few hours. Afterwards, my mom called me downstairs and told me something shocking. "Your father and I are getting remarried.. We're moving to Paris."

I grumbled and I sat up and walked down to see what was up, and I was in time to hear the news. "What?" I said happily. "Why move to Paris?" I asked. Great they were getting married! But why move?

"Because, he really likes it there and it's home to him now. And I've always wanted to go." I smiled and hugged her. "I'm so happy for you..."

I smiled as I watched them hug, and when she hugged me I said congradulations. This was good for them. For her

My parents went to go shopping, and I went to go take a shower, letting the nice hot water hit my back.

I heard a knock on the door, I jumped up from the couch and answered it, my brother. He was drunk , I could smell it.. And high again... "Hey!" He said, angrily, and he grabbed me and pulled me outside , slamming the door. "Where is dad!" He yelled at me, pushing me into the grass. I looked at him, sadness washing over my face.. "Dad isn't here anymore." I said softly, not looking at the angry drunk that is my brother. "What do you mean?" He said, his voice raising, his words a bit slurred. He was making such a racket.. "He's dead." I said, and I stayed laying in the grass, watching as he broke down into tears.. And stumbled all over the yard yelling. "How!?" He kept yelling.. "I did it.. I had to.. He was going to kill Astoria.. I put a bullet in his head." I said, looking at my brother. What he did next would change my life forever. He took out a gun, and he grabbed me by the shirt pulling me up, pressing the pistol to my chest. "Let's see how you like it, brother!" He yelled, and he shot me, and I fell back into the grass.. Then I felt two more shots, my body went numb, and my world was fading.. t

I heard the three shots and I ran downstairs and outside into the grass. "WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!" I screamed, running to Angus's side and holding his head in my lap. I looked up at the brother and my eyes widened as he raised the gun to me. "Everything." He said, and he pulled the trigger... But there was just a click. The brother's eyes widened, then he took off running. I looked back down at Angus. "Angus, stay with me! You can't die, we just got married, we're supposed to start our life together please.." I whispered, tears streaming down my face. The ambulance soon arrived and rushed him to the hospital..

I just felt numb, but it was a different kind of numb. There was so much pain that it canceled out, and I felt nothing.. I just saw blurry images, and the noises I heard were faint. But I could hear Astoria, and only her face was clear.. "Stay... Strong.." I croaked, then I coughed, blood coming up.. I soon blacked out, and could only hear sounds. I felt people poking needles in me and yelling my name, I couldn't open my eyes. I just couldn't.
"We are losing him!" I heard yelling and I was being wheeled, bright lights.. This must be the hospital.. The place I die.

5 nurses had to hold me back from the door because I lost it when the doctor said we were losing him. "You have to calm down." The nurses said and they forced me into a chair. My parents burst in and asked what happened and I told him and they held me as I sobbed.

I felt peaceful. Everything was so bright.. And I saw my mother, she was standing there, with open arms. "You have to go back." She whispered. "I love you." She said, and I blacked out and felt a jolt, electricity ran through my body. Then I saw More light. Then I soon felt the jolt again, making my body tense up and I opened my eyes. "He's back, he's responding! Heart rate low, get him in the or!" They were yelling, I soon felt a sharp jab in the arm and I was out again, but just asleep..

As they rushed him to another room, I stood up, and the nurses grabbed me again. "What's happening?!" I yelled. "He's responding, they just have too go operate and stabilize him." A doctor said. I sat back down and tried to calm down but it was hard. He has to be okay.. I can't live without him.

It only felt like seconds, but I knew it had to be hours and hours.. I opened my eyes, immense pain upon me as I did so, I just saw white, my eyes struggling to adjust to the lighting. I groaned softly, and I had a choking sensation, a tube was down my throat, and it was helping me breath.. I started to freak out. What happened? What was wrong with me? And I heart beeping, it must have been my heart rate.

A very long time passed until they finally allowed me to go see him. I went in and sat on a chair next to his bed. I gently took his hand. "Hey.." I said gently. He probably can't talk around that thing. "You really scared me, you know.."

I squeezed her hand, and it was weaker than I thought, it looked as if my hand just twitched. I looked at her with sad eyes.. I didn't want her to see me like this.. I wished I could talk. This damn thing needed to be removed. I weakly pressed the nurse button, and I squeezed my eyes shut and groaned, a wave of pain upon me.

The nurse came and gave him more pain medication and I just stayed quietly by his side. "I know what you're thinking." I said. "But no, I'm not leaving you. I'm staying by your side."

The nurse also took out my breathing tube, and I had a small cough attack, every cough so painful. And I could taste blood when I did so. Luckily there was a bowl of mints, and I reached over and I took one, popping it in my mouth.. "Where is that bastard.." I said, my voice very crackly.

"Shh..." I ran my hand through his hair. "The cops found him at the edge of the woods, about to kill himself.. They took him to jail." I kissed his forehead. "You need to rest.."

"You do too.." I said softly, and I brought her hand to my lips, kissing it gently. The doctor then walked in, smiling. "Hey! Good to see you're awake " he said. "Now, it looks like you were pretty lucky.. You do have some nerve damage in you're back. And you have fluid in your lungs still. You will be here for a little while, take it easy and don't strain yorelf." He said, then walked out

My parents came in and chatted with us for a little while, then they left. Since I'm technically a family member, I get to stay even after visiting hours. "I really thought I lost you babe.."

"I thought I lost you.. The last thing I remember is him pointing the gun at you ." I said, tears filling my eyes. "I blacked out not knowing if I was going to wake up. And if I did , if you would be there.." I said, wiping my eyes. "Im scared Astoria. I'm so scared."

I leaned down and kissed the tears away. "He ran out of bullets." I whispered. "It's okay. I'm okay, but most importantly, you're okay." I whispered. I looked into his eyes. "I promise."

"Okay.." I said softly .. She was so calming.. "Sit with me " I said. This was a huge hospital bed. I moved slightly, and groaned in pain.. "Please." I said..

I slowly and cautiously sat with him, my hand resting on his knee softly. I hate seeing him in so much pain.

"You know .. I blacked out when they took me back.. I believe I died Astoria.." I said softly. "It was so peaceful.. I saw my mom.. She told me she loved me, and she told me to go back.. Then I woke up, they had got done shocking me.." I said, rubbing her leg softly.

"I'm glad you got to see your mom Angus.." I whispered. "Now you know that she's at peace, wherever she is." I gently took his hand and squeezed it.

I nodded slowly. "Yeah.." I said. "I'm tired.." I said softly, and I took her hand and closed my eyes. My recovery was just starting ..

"Okay baby.. Get some rest.. I'll be right here when you wake up." I kissed his forehead and watched as he fell asleep. We never get a break.. Something always happens to us..

I fell asleep, and I slept for so long, I woke up the next morning, my body felt numb. Must be some new pain medication. "You're up, you're going to try to walk today, alright?" The nurse said, smiling at me.

"Already?" I asked the nurse. "But he just went into surgery.. Shouldn't he recover first?"

"Its good to get him at least to stand for a few moments, to bed the blood rushing more." She said. She rose the bed so I was sitting up, and my body still was pretty numb, she helped me swing my legs over and she got a walker, and put it in front of me, and helped me stand. My body was shaky and unstable..

I watched, my heart clenching. I feel so bad.. And there's nothing I can do to help.. Just to stay by his side and support him the best I can.

"I can't.." I said softly, using all my strength was not enough. I sat back down, sighing..

I sighed and kissed his cheek sympathetically. "It was your first try. It'll just take time. You'll get there."

"What if it never happens.." I said gently. She would be stuck with me, a cripple for a young husband..

"It will. I promise." I said, pecking his lips. "Don't give up hope. You never gave up on me, so don't you dare give up on yourself."

I nodded slowly. "Okay.." I said. "I won't." I said. And for the next few days I worked hard every day, until I stood and was walking.. "Wow.." I said taking the steps. I felt as if I didn't need the walker, and I slowly let go and walked without it hesitantly

Me and the nurse stayed close in case he fell, but he was walking beautifully. I grinned at him. It's like a miracle!

It didn't last for long, because I had to sit back on the bed fairly quick as the pain came back. But this was good! As soon as I thought that, the nurse had to re dress my bullet wounds..

I didn't like the sight of blood very much so I didn't watch, I just tightly held Angus's hand in support.