Cautious Love

It was all so sweet, this.. would I get this with Ashley? With anyone else?
I woke the next morning, and I didnt want to move, her still in the exact same position, just a little closer. "Hey.." I said softly..

I woke up and opened my eyes, yawning softly. "Hi.." I answered softly. I slowly moved out of that position, sitting up. My wrist aches..

"Do.. you have any bacon?" I asked, smiling slightly, we both loved bacon, our favorite breakfast food.

I looked down at him and grinned. "Of course! " I answered. I hopped out of bed and went to the kitchen, getting out the bacon.

I helped get our plates out. And cups of milk, and when the bacon was done, her and I had a mini feast. Like old times. We would always sleepover at eachothers houses, we never did anything all parents assume we would. Our parents just were never home to see it.

After we finished eating, I washed the dishes. "So.. It's Sunday.. Wanna watch movies?"

I looked up and nodded. "Lets do it." I said, and I grabbed us some pillows and blankets and we got comfortable on the couch.

I put in the first movie and I sat with him on the couch, laying my head on his shoulder.

My shoulder was not sore anymore, I got my stitches out on Tuesday, thank god..
This movie was both very inappropriate and very funny, to rhe point her and I were in tears

"Oh my god, I can't breathe!." I gasped, doubling up in laughter. My stomach was killing me from the laughter.

Soon we calmed ourselves. "Wow, I havent laughed that hard in years..." I said, smiling.
We did this pretty much all day, untill it was really late. I kissed her forehead before heading to my bedroom and flopping onto my bed.

The next morning, I woke up and took a shower, then I got dressed and did my hair and makeup. "Ready?" I asked him. We walked to school together, talking about random stuff.

"I have a chemistry test today.." I mentioned. "That I forgot to study for.." I said, sighing. "Fuck.."

---------- Post added at 09:14 AM ---------- Previous post was at 09:14 AM ----------

(So have the fight happen when at school? Maybe ashley runs up to him?+)

I frowned. "Too bad." I answered. We walked inside of the building and to my locker.

---------- Post added at 11:16 AM ---------- Previous post was at 11:15 AM ----------

Yes

I walked her to her locker, and I started to walk away when I felt someone grab my hand, and lips press to mine. "Hey.." I heard Ashley say. "Hi.." I said, a bit surprised

I turned around and dropped my books in shock. Ashley?! This is the cool kind girl he's been seeing? Cool my ass! "You can't be serious right now." I said, slamming my locker shut. "Ashley. Out of all the girls you could have chosen, you had to go with the biggest bitch in school."

"What? What are you talking about?" I said, I was really confused. "Ashley does not even know you." I said, looking at her. "Maybe you shouldn't be so judgmental."

---------- Post added at 09:25 AM ---------- Previous post was at 09:25 AM ----------

(Crap, bad timing, gotta go.)

"Doesn't know me? Who do you think is the one who started shit with me because of the abortion?" I asked, crossing my arms. "I have no idea what she's talking about." Ashley said innocently, tossing her blonde hair.

"Well it couldn't have been this Ashley." I said, shaking my head. "Why cant you be happy with me for once?" I said

"I'm not fucking blind, I know it's this Ashley. I would be happy with you if you stopped being a fucking dumbass!" I yelled, glaring at both of them. I am going to fucking kill both of them.

People were stopping in the hallway now. "How was I supposed to fucking know, huh? I was not here when this shit happened, Angel face!"
That was a mistake, that I instantly regretted. All the jocks went "ooooh!!"

I cringed at the name, and just stared at him for a moment. "You're a fucking asshole." I spat, then I burst into tears, hurrying out of the building and running back home.

Fuck! I say crazy shit when I'm mad.. And I don't mean any of it! "Get the fuck off me." I said, pushing Ashley away. "You're the fucking whore of the school, and would have loved to fuck me on the first date. You're the real angel face around here." I spat at her, tears filling her eyes, and everyone looked at me shocked.
I quickly pushed past everyone and rushed back home.. How.. Would I fix this?..

I ran to my room and slammed and locked the door. I ripped the bandage off of my wrist and grabbed my razor, gashing my wrist. I hate him.. So much..

I tried to open her door.. But it was locked. "Astoria.. Let me in.." I said. "We can talk about this..." I said.

"Get the fuck out!" I screamed at him. "Go back to your whore Ashley, and you can start being like everyone else, because you're already off to a great start!"

"Just let me come in.. Now. Then I'll leave.. You'll never have to deal with me every again, I promise.." I said.. But I began to pick at the lock, there was about a thousand bobby pins everywhere..
My stomach was turning, anxiety and sadness flaring up..

"Just leave me alone!" I went into the closet and cut a few more, sobbing furiously.

I picked the lock and the door opened. I saw blood, quite a bit of it.. "Astoria.." I said, and I opened her closet, seeing her there sobbing. I made her do this, this was my fault... My heart ached so much to see her like this. I took the razor, and I put the bloody thing in my pocket. "Give me all of them, now."

"Don't you tell me what to do!" I screamed, and I got up, shoving him, hard.

I let her shove me, I deserved it. "Just tell me where they are, and promise me you will not do this anymore, then I will be gone." I said, calmly. "Please.." I said, pained, tears filling my eyes..

"In the drawer." I groaned, moving to lay on the bed. I couldn't stop crying.

I did just that and I grabbed all of them, and I put them in my room, when I cmpame back I knelt in front of her. I wiped a tear away on her cheek and I looked her in the eyes.
"Hey.. I know I fucked up.. Big time.. And I've said things to hurt you.. And I can't take those words back that I've said, and I'm not asking you to forgive me at all. I'm just letting you know I strongly regret it. I regret coming back, and ruining things even more for you.. I never meant to cause you that kind of pain.. Just please Astoria, promise me you will not hurt yourself anymore, okay? Then I will be out of your life completely..."

I turned my face away from him and attempted to stop crying. "I.. Promise." I said shakily.

"Okay.." I breathed quietly.. I Felt tears fill my eyes, and I wiped them quickly before standing and heading to my room.. I was packed and ready to go, I swung my bag over my shoulder and I left, going back to the homeless shelter..
I felt pain... The only feeling I could feel right now., when I got into the bathroom, I gave myself a large dose of heroin, and I sunk down in the stall, leaning against the wall, completely numb..

After I finally calmed down, I bandaged myself up and went to his room. He's not there.. I grabbed my phone and quickly called him. "Please pick up.."

I was blurry, and I felt a weird thing in my pocket, I pulled the weird device out and pressed the green button. "He...Hello....ahh.." I groaned out, my speach clearly impaired..

He sounded seriously fucked up.. "Angus? Where are you? I'm coming to get you."

"Shit.. I'm.. Sor..ry I wasn't sup..supposed to talk to you, eve..ever again." I mumbled, and my brain was everywhere. "I.. I think immm.. In the bathroom at the sh..shelter." I said, some words hard to say. "And, I would.. Like cheese on.. The pizza..." I added, confused.

"Stay there." I said, and I hung up and borrowed my mom's car. I drove quickly to the shelter, and I went in and found the bathroom. "Angus." I said, pulling him up. "Come on."