Cautious Love

"Im up for challenges." I said, looking down, I gave his hand a squeeze before letting it go.

I sighed when she let go of my hand, and I moved my arm. "Alrighty then." I said with a smile.

I saw the disappointing look in his eyes when I let go if his hand, I took it slowly again.. "Thank you.. and. You know what helps me with addiction . The gym."

I chuckled and looked down at our hands. "How so?" I asked.

"You just.. take everything out on the equipment and in my case, the volleyball. And trust me, it helps."

I chuckled. "Whatever you say." I said. I looked out the window and sighed. At least this is better than home.

"I was going to go now. Want to join?" I asked him, looking up, smiling

I shrugged. "Sure." I went and changed and then walked down with her.

We went to the gym and it was a blast, having someone to do this with.. when we got back to the room, I took a shower and went to sleep, exhausted..
Then I had that dream. That same terrifying dream. I found my parents.. dead.. I jumped up in the middle of the night, qnd I tried to quietly calm myself, but my silent crying and anxiety both sparked up, and I quickly went into the bathroom, and I got out the whiskey I hid, and I drank and drank,..

I woke up when I heard crying, and I got worried when she didnt come out. I got up and went to the bathroom and I caught her drinking. I quickly took the bottles from her. "Stop!"

I didnt have much to drink, I just hugged my knees to my chest and I pressed my forhead to my knees, letting my hair fall like a curtain.. "Im s...so sorry...."

I sat down next to her and gathered her in my arms. "Hey.. It's okay.. What happened?"

I hated having These .. breakdowns. I leaned into his warm embrace ,.. "Just.. a nightmare.." I said, calming down..

I rubbed her back gently. "It'll be okay.. I promise."

"I didnt mean drink.. im so sorry..." I said, burying my face in his neck..

I gently pulled her in my lap. "Shh.. Stop apologizing.."

My breathing evened out, and soon I was calmed down. I felt buzzed, and tired.. I was glad I had no makeup on, and I slowly brushed my hair from my face, tucking it behind my ear. "Thank you.. I.. didnt mean for you to see me like this.. im never like this.."

"I'm always here." I said softly, and I went back to our room and laid down, watching the TV.

I threw the bottles away, and I went and laid back down, curling up in the bed. "I love this show." I said, looking at the screen.

I looked up at her and smiled. "Me too." I replied.

A few weeks passed, and Justin and I got closer and closer, pretty much best friends. Both of us haven't slipped up in a while, which was a big acomplishment. I walked into the room, and I looked up to see he wasnt back yet.. hope he was okay.

I was shaking in anger as I clutched my mother's letter in my fist. "Here.." My friend said, slipping me a syringe. I thanked him and went into the bathroom and injected for the first time in a while. In a matter of seconds, I was high and crying. I was so ashamed. I walked into the bedroom, and threw the syringe away, sitting on the floor and covering my face in my hands.

I quickly set my book down, and I knew right away what had happened.. relapse.. I saw him throw the syringe away and I quickly sat by him, and I hugged him. I wasnt angry.. I just needed to know what happened and if he was okay. "Hey.. hey... what happened.." I asked softly, and I rested my head on his shoulder, hoping he would open up..

I silently handed her the letter, my body shaking slightly. The letter said that they had taken all of the money from my account, including my life bonds, and spent it on a trip to Europe. I have nothing now.

I read the letter silently, shocked at what they had done.. what assholes! That was HIS money! I set it down, and I slowly pulled a hand from his face. "Hey.. hon, look at me." I said, he was so high.. his eyes were very dialated.. "You and I.. we can, start a shop. A tattoo shop.. work with me, and you can make money off that with me.. we can fix this, okay?"

I was trembling like crazy, and I looked into her eyes dazedly, nodding slightly. "Yeah.. Okay.." I mumbled.

I knew he was very dazed, and just not thinking all that clearly. I brushed the hair from his eyes, and I helped him up, and to sit on his bed. "Sleep it off, okay?

"Okay.." I mumbled, kissing her cheek before laying down and closing my eyes, trying to fall asleep.

I laid beside him, rubbing his back as he rested. Poor guy.. his parents are sucj bad people. No wonder he is here, its because of them.

I woke up a few hours later, and I smiled when I felt that she was still next to me, though I felt like crap. I turned and looked down at her. "Hey.. Thanks for being there.."

I opened my eyes and I looked over at him. "Hey.. no..problem..." I said, rubbing my tired eyes.

I smiled and tucked a strand of her hair behind he ear. "It's almost dinner time.. Are you hungry?"

I looked at him, and I felt my heart flutter slightly.. "Uhm.. yeah, a little." I said, sitting up, and running my hands through my hair.

I nodded. "Okay." We got up and went down to dinner where they were serving chicken.

After we ate, we headed back to our room. "Hey.. who gave you that needle anywAy? They.. shouldnt be around you."

"Anthony." I answered shortly, going into the bathroom to take a shower. Afterwards, I came out and laid down and took out a magazine.

I nodded, and I looked down at my lap while sitting on my bed. That Anthony can be trouble.. he shouldn't have given him the Heroin.

I noticed how quiet she was, and I frowned, lowering my magazine and looking up at her. "What's wrong?" I asked.

I looked up, smiling slightly, now out of my deep thought. "Oh, nothing." I said, and the look he gave me, I knew he knew I was lying. "Im just a little worried, about you. A relapse like that .. it can change people."

I sighed and looked down. "I know. I'm sorry." I answered, getting up and going to sit with her. "Thanks for worrying."