Rejection and Feedback

I recently read someone who requested that, if a role-player was done with the role-play, then she would like them to tell her, so then she would not be waiting for a reply. I never thought about it before, but I only know of two people who have ever done that. I think I might have been rejected recently, but I don't know yet because the person hasn't gotten back to me. In the end, the most bothersome part for me is not knowing how I could have done better or at least knowing what I did wrong. I don't even know if I communicated incorrectly or if they simply didn't like the idea.

Obviously, people don't like rejection, but it kinda makes it hard to improve, when everyone is afraid of rejecting another person or being rejected. Makes me wish we had an anonymous feedback/review bar next to full-features. I've heard generalities before, but specific information helps put it in perspective. Is it hard for you to be rejected? Is it hard for you to reject? Is there another reason for not bothering with informing the other role-player other than laziness or apathy (not scolding here, because I know that no one is owed a response)?

(Side note and example of me being lazy, has anyone ever given links to something you've written as an example of your writing skill?)

Eh me personally, I tend to get busy with school/real life stuff and when I don't build a strong enough bond with a person it's not personal enough (as in beyond an RP partner) to where I can see them being okay with me not replying for a month or two. I've also found that half the people that say "just tell me if you don't want to RP anymore" are also guilty of doing the same thing so *shrugs* If it's not real life I just get lazy (especially if I'm the one driving the entire plot forward) or bored if there isn't more happening in the roleplay. The more, of course, is something I ought to communicate with my partner but it tends to get harder as I get more complacent/procrastinating. It gets really easy to let something die and eventually, one or both of you forget.

I'm not trying to justify it by any means but this is from a perspective of a chronic 1x1 dropper/dropee. It's why I mostly do group RPs nowadays.

As for your sidenote, I don't do writing samples anymore because my style is still in flux and will change based on setting/seriousness/length/etc. It would be easier for the other person to look through my post history or ask if they really want to see it. I tend to be pretty lax about length/grammar though so that might be part of it.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Cows Go Moo

I'm not trying to justify it by any means but this is from a perspective of a chronic 1x1 dropper/dropee. It's why I mostly do group RPs nowadays.

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That's interesting and cool that groups last longer because of all the people involved.

I'm 100% guilty of dropping off the face of the earth. Granted, when I return, I usually seek out my old partners, apologize, and see if they still want to post (unless it's been like... years. Then I assume we've moved on).

Since I'm notorious for this, I now give everyone an advanced head's up that, if I do vanish, not to take it to heard. I'm still interested; I'm just not around. It tends to work well because anyone who's looking for a highly active partner, knows to avoid me. XD

In the past, I think I've only had to tell 3 people I was done. When I do it, I explain why. The one that stands out the most was with regard to someone's character. I just couldn't deal with their character. They were one of those always-perfect, never-at-fault characters. Oh and they couldn't die. They were a master ninja assassin who's a genius. Yadda yadda yadda. They had no flaws. I hate perfect characters. So I called them out on it. Never heard back from them. Oops.

OH! And I have rage quit RPs before. I hate it when people gang up on you. You are your partners discuss one option. Everyone knows the roles. You make your post. And then they completely disregard everything. Normally, I wouldn't complain and just roll with it but my character was drugged against my will. We went from a peaceful truce to a OH BY THE WAY, WE LIED, WE'RE GOING TO DRUG YOU AND KIDNAP YOUR GIRLFRIEND. YOLO. Like... wut. So I rage quit. Not my best moment as I created A LOT of enemies but whatever. I was so pissed.

With regard to the samples, I don't really provide them. If someone wants to see how I write, they can check my history. If they have a requirement, they need to do the work. Not me.

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Originally Posted by Xavirne

I'm 100% guilty of dropping off the face of the earth. Granted, when I return, I usually seek out my old partners, apologize, and see if they still want to post (unless it's been like... years. Then I assume we've moved on).

Since I'm notorious for this, I now give everyone an advanced head's up that, if I do vanish, not to take it to heard. I'm still interested; I'm just not around. It tends to work well because anyone who's looking for a highly active partner, knows to avoid me. XD

In the past, I think I've only had to tell 3 people I was done. When I do it, I explain why. The one that stands out the most was with regard to someone's character. I just couldn't deal with their character. They were one of those always-perfect, never-at-fault characters. Oh and they couldn't die. They were a master ninja assassin who's a genius. Yadda yadda yadda. They had no flaws. I hate perfect characters. So I called them out on it. Never heard back from them. Oops.

OH! And I have rage quit RPs before. I hate it when people gang up on you. You are your partners discuss one option. Everyone knows the roles. You make your post. And then they completely disregard everything. Normally, I wouldn't complain and just roll with it but my character was drugged against my will. We went from a peaceful truce to a OH BY THE WAY, WE LIED, WE'RE GOING TO DRUG YOU AND KIDNAP YOUR GIRLFRIEND. YOLO. Like... wut. So I rage quit. Not my best moment as I created A LOT of enemies but whatever. I was so pissed.

With regard to the samples, I don't really provide them. If someone wants to see how I write, they can check my history. If they have a requirement, they need to do the work. Not me.

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OH HEY XAVI LADYBUG HAS SOMETHING TO SAY TO YOU IN REGARDS TO POOFING.

I'm sorry you know I love you, I couldn't resist.

Anyways, hi (this is literally my first post on this site in like 3 years oops). Rejection sucks, as does RP dropping - but I think the reason no one ever tells anyone they're leaving is because rpers tend to not like conflict, and I don't think anyone wants to hurt anyone's feelings. Sometimes, writing styles just aren't compatible but that doesn't mean you don't know what you're doing. I've been rejected plenty of times, and eventually you just sort of start ignoring it. It could be any reason that it happens, and I'm guilty of dropping too because I don't want someone to feel like they're bad at what they do.

I think there's also the issue of where people are on the rp skill curve - everyone sucks when they start, like literally NO ONE is good at rping from the get go. Lord knows I was a WRECK back when I began on MSN groups. And even reading some of my posts on here compared to what I write on Tumblr, I cringe. Sometimes I think when people end up writing with someone whose in a WAY different place on the skill curve, they drop - and it goes both ways. I've dropped because I was intimidated by my partner and was certain they'd NEVER like me, and I've dropped because I felt that my partner might need a little more time. That doesn't mean they're BAD at rp, it just means they need more practice. But I dont think anyone wants to tell someone, especially a beginner, that - because they don't want them to feel bad.

Idk, this went on way longer than I thought. I guess TL;DR: Its usually not personal, I wouldn't worry too much about it, nature of the beast and all that.